On making mistakes

We are only human. We too make mistakes. Reflecting on the mistakes I have done in the past tuli missions, I am convinced that it is my duty to use them to improve myself -- I should not repress them as some others do. Yes, they are mistakes, but why repress the one good thing which may come out of it, self-improvement? They are unavoidable and we must take great care to not make mistakes, but inevitably, we do... When the time comes, it is only right that we keep these mistakes burned into our minds so that we never commit them again. It is the least we can do for our patients who have been put into risk because of our carelessness.

Mistakes last tuli mission:
1. Noticed a mistake a partner made and failed to call him out for it.

In my defense, the damage was done and nothing could have been done. But I should have had the courage to tell him right then and there that what he was doing was wrong so that in the future he would not commit the same mistake. Next time, I will be more assertive even though I am very young compared to these people I am working with.

2. Failed to aspirate before injecting anesthesia

Carelessly I forgot to aspirate. So there was a tiny chance that what I had injected had been injected intravenously which could have potentially caused side effects. Looking back now, luckily I dont think my patient experienced anything out of the ordinary, so I consider myself lucky. Although, the anesthesia wasn't as effective for him.... could this have been a side effect of my carelessness?

3. Accidentally dropped a suture packet

This isnt a major error, because we just had to reopen another pack, pero sayang! I am still a noob, and I dont have the skills to maximize concentration on my patient AND efficiently manage costs.

For the record, I also made mistakes during my first tuli mission. But I also got over them and saw them as opportunities to improve. Specifically, I made mistakes in stitching and in identifying anatomical structures. I made sure that I did not commit the same mistake this time around. And I didn't. My stitches were on point. But yet I got wrong this time what I got correct last time. So that is a lesson in itself, that I should keep on reviewing. Medicine is a lifetime of learning and relearning, after all.

I once felt bad about my mistakes after the first tuli mission, thinking that I was a failure for doing them, and that I should quit going to tuli missions altogether. Nope nope nope. That is the worst thing I could possibly do. The one good thing about making mistakes is that it gives you wisdom and experience. To quit after having made these mistakes is to bury them away as if they have never happened - never to be used to improve oneself or help improve the quality of health for others. In that case, it would be a total waste, because not only did you commit a mistake, but it also didn't bear fruit. At the very least, I should use it to improve myself and others when I courageously tell them about my flaws, in the hopes that they too will learn the lessons I have in my practice.